What does it mean to be truly limitless? Each of you may have a slightly different definition, but to me, being limitless means knowing that I can create my life as I want it, that whatever I choose to have, I can know with confidence that it is in alignment with my highest good and that I will get to experience it. Being limitless to me means having this ability and power to create my experiences and to do so with joy, happiness, peace, love and gratitude for every experience, opportunity and lesson. Many friends have shared their definition of limitless to be knowing that they can achieve anything, their goals, their dreams, and to do so without having to jump through a million painful hurdles.
What is standing in the way between you and your dreams right now? What is making your path to being truly limitless look like an abnormally steep mountain with far too many rocks and sharp edges? It’s that beautiful, magical thing that determines your experiences and emotions that sits between your ears: your brain. Your brain is truly incredible. I know you’re thinking “oh man, not another mindset thing again! I want the skills needed to be limitless, not another silly mindset post that just tells me to meditate and instantaneously I will magically have a ton of money and success.” I feel you. I would have been the first to say that to you 5 years ago. I would not have been open to hearing that my mind could be the thing stopping me from making the amount of money I wanted and achieving the success I desired. Well, I was wrong. It took a while, but once I became open to not just hearing what the science and brain scans were saying (check out You Are The Placebo by Dr. Joe Dispenza for super cool brain scans and a full breakdown of the science piece), but started learning, reading and taking action to rewire my brain and change the countless thought patterns and beliefs I had that were detrimental to my health and wellbeing let alone by business, my entire life changed for the better. This was not some magic pill overnight. It took time and it took effort and the more I went down that rabbithole of possibilities, more change happened within me and all around me.
Science has shown us that we can in fact rewire our brains. Why does that matter? Because that party line of “I have always been this way” is therefore not a scientifically backed reason for you not to be able to change. It is a fear response that keeps us stuck in our ways, repeating patterns of thoughts, behaviors and emotions even if they no longer serve us and are in direct contrast with all we actually desire. Our brains are proven to be able to create new neural pathways, allowing us to change beliefs, thoughts and emotions that show up in familiar patterns, and create new ways of thinking which subsequently affect all of the things we experience as well as how we experience them and react to them. Just like new habits can be formed, new thought patterns can be formed as well.
Your Turn To Take Action
The first step to changing your brain, which will change all aspects of your life, is to take accountability. This is the step that usually gets a little tricky because it can be painful at first. Accountability means accepting that you are responsible for all the good in your life as well as the bad. At first, that may be a hard pill to swallow because you think that it’s not possible since of course you don’t want to be suffering and struggling and staying put in any undesired experiences and emotions. However, this single thing is the most empowering because you no longer are a victim of your circumstance, a bystander of your own life where things just happen to you, you become the badass boss that you are of your life and get to create things that happen for you, allowing you to experience everything you have ever wanted and enjoy the process too.
Congratulations on taking the first step to becoming limitless. I am proud of you and I hope you are too. The next thing that I want you to do is to start noticing thoughts and beliefs that are recurring. These could be things that you say often, thoughts that come up frequently, things you say to yourself, etc. Below are some common examples of recurring thoughts and beliefs that many people have around money, love, and self:
- If I have a lot of money then I won’t have time.
- Who am I to be deserving of great wealth?
- If I am wealthy, then my friends and family will no longer love me, because they always blame the rich.
- Money is the root of all evil.
- Why should I get to live in an expensive house while that homeless person begs for food?
- Being wealthy is an injustice; it is not fair for me to have and others to not have.
- I will be an easy target for scammers if I have money.
- If I am rich, I won’t be able to tell who actually loves me for me vs. who is just using me for my money.
- I am not good enough or deserving of great wealth and success.
- I have no value, I am valueless, so why should I receive so much wealth for the work I am doing. I don’t deserve it.
- This is the best I will get, so better to stay in this relationship, even though I am miserable.
- I am so lucky that someone says they love me even though their behavior doesn’t really show it; I don’t want to be alone, I can’t be alone so I will stay even though I am not happy.
- My partner does not treat me the way I want to be treated, but I deserve it. If only I could be better, then they won’t yell at me.
- I have too much baggage, no one will love that. I am too complicated.
- Having a partner will cause me to lose myself, they will dim my light, I am better off with no one.
- I can’t lose weight. I try but it never works, it is harder for me than it is for everyone else, something is just wrong with me, it’s not possible for me.
- I am not smart enough.
- If only I had more curves, then I would be beautiful.
- I have so much cellulite, therefore I can’t wear shorts, even when it is 90 degrees.
- Life is harder for me than it is for most people.
- No one understands me and what I went through.
- I can’t do *insert what you believe you can’t do here.*
- I can’t meditate; my brain doesn’t shut off like yours does.
- I am broken. I am damaged goods.
- I don’t belong here. I don’t fit in.
If any of the above resonate with you, you are onto something here. Do this exercise and write down any thought patterns you notice. Think of it like a fun science experiment, no not the ones that you got bad grades on in school, but a super cool science experiment that will show you the inner workings of your brain and how you can change it. Try to have fun with it if you can because it is a pretty remarkable experiment you are conducting here with sizable outcomes that can and will transform your life.
Another great way to pull limiting beliefs out of you is to close your eyes in silence and think about what it is you truly want. How would you feel if you had it? Envision it in full detail and notice as the observer of your thoughts, what resistance comes up, what feelings. I love this one because it helps us realize we may have limiting beliefs we did not know were there. For example, when I was trying to sell my first company, I kept getting offers that fell through and after it happened so many times and the feedback I received about the company itself was positive, I decided to try this exercise. As I envisioned the deal closing at the valuation that made sense for my company, the money being transferred to my account, I immediately felt a tightness in my chest and the thought that rose to the surface immediately was “not good enough. You created a company and are only selling it for this? What an embarrassment.” I didn’t even realize consciously that this was there and it helped me identify this unrealistic belief that I created over the years that only a certain number was “good enough” and could be considered a success. Of course, that is why the pattern of experience kept recurring. I then tried the same exercise but this time with this grand headline making number that it would sell for. The thought that came up right away was “thief. You are not worthy of this number. You can’t sell it for this, no matter what, even if the buyer sees it worth this much. It is not. You did not create anything worthy of this type of value.” Within those 15 minutes, I discovered the beliefs that were blocking me from selling my company for 2.5 years; my subconscious decided it was better to just not sell it than to sell in either of the above scenarios, and therefore my experience, my reality gave me exactly that.
Once you identify the key thought patterns and beliefs you’ve held for years, your work is unfortunately not done. You have to then start retraining your brain to hold the new beliefs and thought patterns you desire instead. Kristen Hartnagel created a super simple 3 step process that I have found to be the most effective and also the quickest and easiest way to start changing your thought patterns. Choose one fear, one thought, one belief, or one pattern and write it down in a notebook and run it through her process. Her 3 step process is as follows:
- Step 1: Detach with Amusement
- Your brain is innocent and just repeating thought patterns.
- Your ego is innocent and just striving to keep you ‘safe’ in the known.
- You get to notice the triggered pattern of thought, and without judgment, recognize its powerlessness.
- Step 2: Reduce to the Ridiculous
- You are standing on a point in time with infinite ways the future could unfold – recognize this thought as ONE of those infinite ways.
- Pull the thought all the way out and play it out in 2 ways: what’s the worst that could happen, what’s the best that could happen.
- See the worst as just a thought with no power over you.
- Step 3: Invest Wisely
- Tap into the way the BEST that could happen would feel when manifested.
- Visualize that as reality.
- Don’t move past the exercise until you reach the feeling place.
Rinse and repeat. Creating new thought patterns takes time. Unlearning deeply embedded beliefs and learning new ones take time. Just like with everything else, it is all about doing the work consistently. Your brain is beautiful, but it needs repetition to permanently learn. Just how your undesired thoughts and beliefs come naturally to you now, over time the desired thoughts and beliefs will too be automatically there. This is truly the key to becoming limitless, to feeling joy, peace, happiness, love, purpose and experiencing success and all the wealth and abundance you desire. I wish I could say there was a magic pill, I know I would have been the first to sign up to take it. However, by intentionally having fun and making that a goal as well while I retrain my brain, I have come to love and actually enjoy the process (shocker I know), not just the end result. I see you as you are and I know you can have everything you want in life because all of that power to create and experience is already within you. It is time to unleash the superpowers you have within. I believe in you, but now you just have to believe in you too.